No Time For God?

FYI:This was supposed to be posted yesterday, but I was unable to post it.

This morning I woke up feeling like a wreck. 

I felt guilty and filthy. Yes…filthy.

Not physically filthy, but spiritually filthy.

 

Yesterday, I didn’t spent much time with God. I prayed to Him early that morning. I read a scripture and then I hopped on the laptop.

The rest of my day was spent on my blog. Yes…all day. Only stopping once in a while to cook, use the bathroom, help the kids and my hubby with something etc.

You see, I think I may have finally found something that really suits me. 

Writing and Creating.
Two things that I love to do. I don’t know if you can tell through my writing, but this blog is very therapeutic for me! 

It makes me feel happy, liberated, and free! Yippee!

Imagine: It’s a warm, sunny day outside. The perfect weather. You’re in a car. You see a long beautiful open road ahead of you. Oddly, there are no cars ahead of you or behind you. Just a beautiful, open road. Full of space, gorgeous green grass, and a few trees. You open your sunroof, and stick half of your body out of it. You tilt your head back; lift your arms to the sky. You are relaxed from your toes, to your fingertips. The cool breeze blows through your hair. The sun is shining on you. Your skin is warm and glowing. Fluffy clouds lay perfectly in the clear blue sky. You close your eyes and smell lovely aromas from flowers that you don’t even know by name. Fresh, clean, crisp air flows in and out of your lungs as you breathe deeply. You are relieved. Your hands are free. Your mind is free. You are happily basking in the ambiance of this amazing moment.  

Ahhh…were you there with me?

That’s how this blog makes me feel.

 Because, it makes me feel this way I spent all day trying to perfect it. I was trying to brush up on my HTML and CSS skills. Trying to figure out how to build my own design. All the while, my spirit was tugging at me.

“You’ve spent too long on this laptop. You need to spend time with God.” I felt the Holy Ghost alerting me. 

I kept reasoning with myself, “Okay I’m going to get off in one more hour. I have to get this blog right first.”

One hour turned into two, three, four, until it was almost midnight! By this time, guilt began to set in. I had ignored the Holy Ghost. I had taken my attention off of God and given it to my blog. I had turned my blog into…dun dun dun….an idol.

How am I going to have a blog about my journey with God if I’m not even spending time with Him?  He is the co-writer of it, but I’m not even consulting Him? 

I painfully shut down my laptop, laid before God, repented and asked for forgiveness. But for some reason, I didn’t feel that He accepted it. So I kept asking for forgiveness and kept repenting. Then I realized that I thought He was mad at me, which was the reason I felt like He wasn’t accepting my repentance. 

I had to resort back to my post a few days ago about that negative feeling of “God is Mad at Me.” 

You can read that

I had to remember that post before I let that negative feeling manifest. When I don’t spend time with God or read His word, I become weak. I easily give into temptation and begin to focus on other things(which I will be posting about soon). I MUST spend time with Him, He is my strength.

Isaiah 40:28-31(NLT)

Have you never heard?

 Have you never understood?
The Lord is the everlasting God,

the Creator of all the earth.
He never grows weak or weary.

No one can measure the depths of his understanding.He gives power to the weak

and strength to the powerless.

Even youths will become weak and tired,

and young men will fall in exhaustion.

But those who trust in the Lord will find new strength.

They will soar high on wings like eagles.
They will run and not grow weary.
 They will walk and not faint.

The enemy can distract you through things that you love. Even, if it is something that you are doing for the glory of God. 

“This blog will not become my god.”

Get thee behind me satan. My time, praise and worship belongs to God and God alone. Not to my blog, myself, my children, my husband or any other thing that I love. God comes first and foremost, before anything and anyone. 

Please give me the strength to resist the temptation of spending more time on things than I do with You. I know that without you, I am weak. I know that You created me for You. To serve you and to  spend time with You daily. Sometimes my flesh gets in the way of my spirit. Help me to learn how to yield to the voice of the Holy Ghost when I have spent too much time away from You. Please keep me Father, because I need to be kept.

Wait a minute.

Go back up to the paragraph where I told you to imagine that you were in a car. 

I'll wait.....

Okay, question...WHO was driving the car while I was hanging out of the sunroof, stress free and enjoying the breeze? Did you forget that I was in a moving car? Who was behind the wheel?? I'll explain in my next post. Stay tuned!